Help! My partner won’t discipline: Part 2
Adele Cornish, BSW
If you’re a stepfather or stepmother and your partner doesn’t welcome your input on discipline matters, take a look at what others in your position have done:
“Due to the fact that our parenting styles differ vastly, I’m strict and my husband is very lenient, we have had to decide to discipline separately. While we will discuss the discipline ultimately the bio parent will discipline the bio child. This has freed us to appreciate each other and love one another with our differences.”
“It takes work but I try to see myself as having two separate relationships with my husband. One is my relationship as a co-parent (which ebbs & flows) and the other is my relationship as a wife (constant).” jsb
Ultimately it is the bio parent who must take responsibility for the way they choose to raise or discipline their children. Sure as a stepparent you may see ways to make the journey easier but you can’t parent for your partner. Your partner or spouse does not have to do as you say, just ask that they take your views into consideration, letting them have the final say and bearing the consequences for their decisions. So if your input isn’t welcome, consider leaving the parenting to your partner but request their children act in a respectful manner towards you.
“It doesn’t change my love for him, he is a good father and provider, he is at times I feel too soft on them but he does ask me what I think and we try and find common ground most of the time. If not I just think well it’s his kids let them get on with it.”
If you would rather have some direct input into discipline issues but need help with how to formulate a plan that both you and your partner can both agree on click here
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