Adele Cornish, BSW
Children: Helping them adjust
With a lack of readily available resources, it’s easy to see why some couples think their blended family will function like an intact family where both biological parents live together. But it doesn’t. Divorce reorganises a family spreading it over two households. The primary emotional blood ties remain the same, despite the change in structure and loyalties are continually tested.
Holiday Season Strategies
Step or blended families present a fresh beginning for a couple and their children. Blended families provide new opportunities to build family traditions after the loss they have evolved out of (death, divorce or separation). A single adult or parent can again enjoy the support of another adult alongside them and their children acquire another role model and possibly step siblings.
Surviving the Teenage Years!: Essential information for every blended family with teens
Parents and stepparents can be tempted to think their teen deliberately misreads situations or frustrates them, but this is not necessarily the case. Your teen’s prefrontal cortex – the area of the brain responsible for impulse control and understanding risks and consequences is not fully developed until the age of 25 years. At the same time hormones are surging which helps to explain why teenagers can be impulsive, risk-taking and quick to anger.
Blog: Parenting without guilt
I recently asked those on my email list whether the following statement reflects their experience: “My duty as a biological parent to train and discipline my children is done without guilt.”
Discipline: Speaking from experience…
“A counselor told me my children are mine to discipline and to raise. If there should be any issues, my spouse should bring them to me and we should discuss them and come to a resolve before we change anything or discuss issues with my kids. At times, I was so frustrated because I felt like I was alone in raising my kids but in end this style was right on. My spouse did not discipline my children, I did. He did not make changes and demands on my children, I did. This way he was never the “bad step-parent”. I know at times this is hard for my new current spouse but it truly has helped in the transition of becoming a blended family. My step-children do not know my frustration, changes in the home or how I feel over certain situations. This enables us to have a better relationship.”